Who Believed In YOU most?

Who Believed in YOU the most?

As leaders, we often ignite and cultivate the belief in others, seeing other people’s magic, gifts, and innate soul beauty.
With steady encouragement and the field of unconditional love, we provide an environment for people to grow and blossom.

Today I’ve been contemplating all the people who believed in me most.

There is a process that I do that I am going to share with you that always opens my heart wide.

This process can flood our hearts with gratitude and extend the energetic blessings to all who believed in us the most.

The first person who comes to mind is my elementary teacher. She was attentive and curious about me, a little girl who walked to school by herself, stayed up to help her tidy the classroom and was drawn to the books under the protective glass. One day she asked me if I wanted to borrow a book I admired for weeks. It was the Wizard of Oz. I remember carrying it tenderly in my arms like I would a child wrapped up in a scarf. I was elated that an adult would trust me with such treasure. I read that book repeatedly, imagining myself as a part of the adventure of finding my courage, my magic, and being around true friends.

The second person that comes to mind was a pastor of a Christian church I joined at twelve years old. Those were some of the most turbulent times in my family environment, with windows broken, screams of rage, and so much terror. Each day at home was filled with anxiety about what calamity will happen next. When I joined the church, I found belonging for the very first time in my life. I’ve found community. The pastor and his family were kind and loving. He was the very first male figure in my life who saw a glimpse of my potential. One day he stopped me, looked me in the eye, and asked: “How are things at home?”I broke down crying, looking away, choking on shame. Family shame. No words came out, but he understood. “Come to our family dinner tonight.” That was one of many moments of compassion in action I’ve witnessed from him. I was learning what compassionate leadership was from direct examples.

Later on, he championed my vision of becoming a youth pastor and helped to send me to the theology school in Ukraine. My own father was never there, battling his inner demons and growing his pain in alcohol. The Universe showed me that it in its Grace, it replaces what is missing in our lives. I felt a fatherly love through the pastor of my church.

My grandmother believed in me. She was the one I felt seen for who I was. Not what I could do. Not how often I could put others' needs before myself. But for who I was. A young girl with hopes and desires to create her dream life and one day see the world. My grandmother had a difficult life, like the majority of her generation. She told me a story about how much she loved going to dances. She would carry her dancing shoes in her hands while wearing rain boots. She only had two dresses and one pair of shoes she could dance, so she cared for those things to make them last. My grandmother died when I was 18, and it was incredibly difficult to go through it. It was the first major loss that I had to learn how to move through. I feel her presence as one of my spirit guides now. “Eat more strawberries”, she reminds me each time I feel her spirit essence. One of my favorite things was to visit her in her countryside home and tend to strawberries together. She would describe each strand, and we would taste them, sharing stories and laughs together. The last time I visited her, I left my hometown behind to attend theology school. I still remember looking into her eyes for the very last time.

(photo of me at seventeen years old, first time traveling to Moscow)

Each person who believed in us offered their energy. Their benevolence. Their love.

Everyone who took the time to see us and encourage us to keep following our dreams offered us an invisible blessing.
Each person who believed in us shaped our belief in ourselves.

The process of honoring those who believed in us:

I enter a quiet space. I put one hand on my heart and another on my belly.

Breathing deeply into my heart, I imagine a golden flame.
With my imagination, I bring the faces of all three people I wrote about.

I think about a specific moment we’ve shared that touched me deeply.

I extend my heart’s energies as waves, feeling gratitude and love.

I look into those people's eyes and say, “Thank you. Thank you for seeing me when I did not know how to do that myself. Thank you for believing in me. Thank you for extending me your kindness. Your compassion is not forgotten. Your generosity shaped me. Your love empowered me. Thank you.”

I sit and relish the feelings of love and gratitude. I may ask them what messages they have for my journey now.
When I feel complete, I release the memories and journal my insights.

And for those who believed me and are still within my reach, I write letters of gratitude and send voice notes and video messages to remind them that their kindness has shaped me.

Katerina Satori

www.katerinasatori.com 

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